National Suicide Prevention Month: How to Support a Loved One Struggling with Suicidal Ideation

When someone you care about is navigating suicidal thoughts, it can feel like standing in a storm with no guidance or direction. You want to help - but it feels like you may say the wrong thing, not do enough or that you may make it feel worse. The truth is, your presence, your willingness to support them and being a listening ear for your loved one can be life-changing. 

Suicidal ideation can range from fleeting thoughts of not wanting to exist to vivid, persistent plans. These thoughts are often a sign of deep emotional pain that the person wants to relieve rather than a desire to die. Many people worry that asking someone struggling with suicidal thoughts may make these ideas worse. In reality, talking about it can take away the feelings of shame this may bring while providing a path to connection. 

So, how can you support a loved one navigating these thoughts and feelings?

Ask, Don’t Assume

Being willing to have an open conversation through asking questions that are asked non-judgmentally can be a lifeline. Struggling silently can feel very isolating - asking questions can be a sign of care and support. 

Listen to Understand, Not to Fix

Though it may be easy to offer solutions, this may not be what someone needs during these moments. Rather than fixing it, providing reflections can be more powerful. Your goal isn’t to erase the pain - it’s to help them feel less alone in it. 

Validate Their Experiences

Minimizing one’s experiences or trying to redirect from their experiences can make someone feel shut out and unimportant. Providing validation can make those struggling feel understood and heard. 

Help Them Stay Safe

If they share with you their plans or their means of how they would hurt themselves, this is the time to help them seek professional health. Though they may be hesitant in doing this, this can be a life-saving step. 

Offer Ongoing Connection

Suicidal ideation can sometimes come and go. Checking in regularly and offering open communication can remind your loved one that they are important and their feelings matter, even when words feel hard. 

Take Care of Yourself Too

Supporting someone in crisis at times can feel exhausting. You deserve to have a space to process, rest and find support too. To support someone effectively, it is important to take care of yourself and your needs along the way. 

Final Thoughts

You don’t have to be perfect or have all the answers in order to offer support. Being a listening ear, offering open communication and providing empathy can be powerful. You are not alone in this - and neither is your loved one. 

If you or someone you know are struggling, reach out to the 988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline by calling or texting 988 to receive help 24/7. 

Samantha Burns, MA, LPC

Samantha is the administrative assistant for Flourish Counseling & Wellness. Samantha is a Licensed Professional Counselor in Colorado and enjoys working with adolescents and young adults who are experiencing challenges with trauma, depression and anxiety.