When You're Not Sure What You're Feeling: The Power of Naming Emotions
Have you ever found yourself saying “I can’t tell what I’m feeling right now”? Maybe your chest feels tight, your thoughts are scattered, or you’re just feeling off. Though this may feel overwhelming, you are not alone in this. Many of us move through the day carrying emotional stress that we have not acknowledged or named. While this might seem harmless, this can shape how we show up in friendships, relationships and other areas of our lives.
Why Naming Emotions Matters
Naming emotions is a way to understand our inner worlds better. When we identify what we’re feeling, we create space between our emotions and our reactions. The space where choice lives is where regulation begins. Research has shown that putting our feelings into words can reduce the intensity of the emotions and activates parts of the brain associated with self-regulation; meaning that the more we name our emotions, the more control we tend to have over them¹.
When Emotions are Blurry
Sometimes, a multitude of emotions can show up at once. Sadness may be tangled with anger, anxiety may be wrapped in guilt or emotional numbness may be masking deeper feelings. These blends of emotions can feel really confusing and complicated, especially if we are unaware of how to talk about the emotions. Slowing down and asking yourself what you are feeling in your body and what feelings may be attached to these sensations can be helpful in becoming more aware of your emotions.
Building Your Emotional Vocabulary
Expanding your emotional vocabulary can create a deeper understanding of our emotions. Instead of asking yourself, “Am I mad, sad or anxious”, it may be more powerful to ask yourself if these feelings may be resentment, discouragement or guilt. The more precisely we name our emotions, the more accurately we can meet our needs.
Naming as a Healing Practice
Naming emotions is often a first step to being able to regulate and control our emotions. It’s how we begin to understand patterns, honor our experiences, and reconnect with parts of ourselves that may have previously been dismissed or silenced. If you’re unsure what you’re feeling, taking a moment to breathe and check in with yourself can be a powerful way to practice self-compassion. Remember, healing is not linear - it is a journey that takes steps rather than strides.
Interested in talking to someone about your emotions? Reach out to us here to connect with one of our therapists!
Sources:
Torre, J.B., & Lieberman, M.D. (2018). Putting feelings into words: Affect labeling as implicit emotional regulation. Emotion Review, 10(2), 116-124.
Samantha Burns, MA, LPC
Samantha is the administrative assistant for Flourish Counseling & Wellness. Samantha is a Licensed Professional Counselor in Colorado and enjoys working with adolescents and young adults who are experiencing challenges with trauma, depression and anxiety.